I firmly believe that one of the most important things we can do in life is to love and be loved.
In the opening line of my book, Letters to My Lovers, I share my belief that I count among my greatest successes in life my ability to continuously open to love. Even when it hurt, even when it failed by all conventional standards, I still believe that I won.
I know it’s an atypical definition of success, but I’m going to claim it anyway. And I think you should too.
When we are courageous enough to open to love – to unfold in the beautiful vulnerability that allows us to see and be seen – we have done something miraculous.
The miracle I’m speaking of? Overcoming all the barriers that warn us against opening. Because loss is inherently tied to love, and none of us likes to lose.
But like every flower knows, once the petals fall off, the seeds make a promise they won’t forget.
Building a garden of love requires us to gently cut down the thorny branches of protection that we thought we always needed. It asks us to recognize the fact that the heart is not made of china, but instead is crafted from the finest leather, one made more supple with wear. One that can always be stitched back together once ripped apart.
If you’re afraid of losing love, I’ll ask you this question: What if there was nothing to protect?
Because even the most difficult relationships teach you how deep your strength runs. Even the most challenging ex is nothing but a reminder of your resilience, and the trust you put into another despite it all.
This is, by no means, permission to chase the difficult ones. Only a reminder to open widely (and wisely) to the greatest power that exists in the universe.
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