Befriend your body. Rewrite the story of your life.

Letters to my lovers

A Memoir of Love and Loss

This book is for anyone who wants to believe in love again. But not love the way it’s being sold. This is not about fairy tales and Hollywood romances, but trusting the true nature of love, one that is as glorious as it is brutal.

Part confessional memoir, part erotica, part tutorial on how to turn heartbreak into fuel, this book will redefine how you see love and manage the inevitable loss that comes with it.

In 25 intensely personal love letters and an essay that offers an alternative to modern romance, you’ll learn what it means to risk everything for love and live to tell the tale. More than just secrets from the bedroom, this book is a guide to creating real intimacy in an increasingly closed-off world.

“I swear to goddess that your book obliterated my anxious attachment style”

K

People often ask me how long it took to write this book. My answer is always the same – a lifetime. Letters to My Lovers is a book that documents the experiences I’ve had as I took the risk of opening my heart – and legs – to give and receive love.

This memoir is an honest documentation of the journey I’ve taken, one love at a time, to understand what makes intimacy worth it despite all the bruises relationships leave on our skin.

Love is a skill, one that is both learned and innate. As more people grow apprehensive of love and intimacy, this book is an offering for those who want to trust again.

“The book is more than you think, it’s a gem of wisdom and of poignant conversations with love, loss, grief and hope. I really enjoyed it and would highly recommend.”

Donata

Join the Lover’s Revolution – Sign up for The Heartbreak Cure

Inspired by Letters to My Lovers, The Heartbreak Cure is a companion course to lead you through the journey of learning to turn your pain into power.

In six modules (with accomanying 1:1 sessions), you’ll learn to reclaim your power from past relationships, harness the wisdom you gained, and become undevastatable in love.

You’ll learn practices and tools that I’ve personally used to heal from heartbreak and transform myself into a Love Goddess (a process I’ve guided countless clients through).

The answers are inside you – you just need to listen.

In Your Words

I am a changed person because of Sonja and so are my relationships.”

Cammie

"I was surprised by how well Sonja really listened to me, and not just my words. She is present, and thus can find the deeper expression among all the rambling and 'I don’t knows.'"

Katie

"Sonja is a wise, authentic guide teaching deep and mind-blowing truths using a fun, light-hearted approach. 

After each session, I feel more in touch with my intuition and filled with optimism."

Debbie

The Journal

A mother’s dinacharya

I used to be the type of person who was offended at any notion that I should rise before 10:00 a.m. From ages 11 to 25, I stayed in bed most days until about 11:00 a.m., then stumbled around in my pajamas until I decided it was finally time to do something with the day. Often, by the time I finally made it out the door, I found that the day had long since passed.

This woman who used to shuffle through life has long since been transformed. When I traded my late nights for day jobs, I found something quite fascinating: I actually enjoyed the mornings. When I began setting my alarm to make it to 6:00 a.m. yoga asana classes, I knew that something had shifted in me that would never go back.

Reclaim morning: A recipe for porridge and life

There is a different kind of morning waiting for you, more than a caffeinated rush to get out the door. This morning is delicious, slow, and nourishing. And it tastes like porridge.

Impossible, you think. You’re busy. You have children who need tending. Breakfast (if it happens at all) is cold cereal or a frozen bagel. But before you believe what you’re saying, I’ll ask: Is that the way you want your life to be?

Forgiveness on a purple silk pillow

I worry that she will hate me one day. That she will take personally my look of exhaustion when she dumps a bucket of bathwater on the bathroom floor, or the way I am a little rough with a wet rag cleaning sweet potato from her ear at dinner.