Befriend your body. Rewrite the story of your life.
Letters to my lovers
A Memoir of Love and Loss
This book is for anyone who wants to believe in love again. But not love the way it’s being sold. This is not about fairy tales and Hollywood romances, but trusting the true nature of love, one that is as glorious as it is brutal.
Part confessional memoir, part erotica, part tutorial on how to turn heartbreak into fuel, this book will redefine how you see love and manage the inevitable loss that comes with it.
In 25 intensely personal love letters and an essay that offers an alternative to modern romance, you’ll learn what it means to risk everything for love and live to tell the tale. More than just secrets from the bedroom, this book is a guide to creating real intimacy in an increasingly closed-off world.
“I swear to goddess that your book obliterated my anxious attachment style”
People often ask me how long it took to write this book. My answer is always the same – a lifetime. Letters to My Lovers is a book that documents the experiences I’ve had as I took the risk of opening my heart – and legs – to give and receive love.
This memoir is an honest documentation of the journey I’ve taken, one love at a time, to understand what makes intimacy worth it despite all the bruises relationships leave on our skin.
Love is a skill, one that is both learned and innate. As more people grow apprehensive of love and intimacy, this book is an offering for those who want to trust again.
“The book is more than you think, it’s a gem of wisdom and of poignant conversations with love, loss, grief and hope. I really enjoyed it and would highly recommend.”
Coming soon – The Heartbreak Handbook
Inspired by Letters to My Lovers, The Heartbreak Handbook will be a companion guide to lead you through the journey of learning to trust yourself enough to love again.
Follow five simple steps to recover after a relationship ends and harness its wisdom, learn practices and tools that I’ve personally used to heal from heartbreak (and used with countless clients), and process your emotions by tapping into creativity with journal prompts and art practices.
The book is in progress and will be ready by early spring. Stay tuned for more details (and be the first to hear about its launch by signing up for emails above).
Don’t want to wait for The Heartbreak Handbook?
Join The Heartbreak Cure – A seven-week program to turn your pain into power.
- Seven 90-minute 1:1 sessions with me (Zoom or in person if you’re local) to teach the core principles of turning pain into power and guide your healing
- A guide with six accompanying somatic rituals to bring the principles of the Heartbreak Cure into your body
- Writing prompts to guide you in crafting your own mythic journey from heartbreak to healing
- Unlimited text support as needed during the coaching container
- A digital copy of the retelling of the legendary love of Parvati and Siva
- A closing ceremony led by me to affirm your legendary lover status
The answers are inside you – you just need to listen.
In Your Words
“I am a changed person because of Sonja and so are my relationships.”
"I was surprised by how well Sonja really listened to me, and not just my words. She is present, and thus can find the deeper expression among all the rambling and 'I don’t knows.'"
"Sonja is a wise, authentic guide teaching deep and mind-blowing truths using a fun, light-hearted approach.
After each session, I feel more in touch with my intuition and filled with optimism."
The Journal
Why love is your best investment right now
Let me sit you down. Let me brew you some tea. And let me spill it all over the living room floor. Chaos is reigning. Trust is dwindling. And you know it. I’m not just talking about the way that politics is ripping families apart. I’m talking about the way that we...
Three things Trump teaches us about how (not) to be an epic lover
I woke up this morning, an American living in Canada, and immediately checked my phone. The first thing I saw was a text from a friend sharing a link to election results. She’s the most anti-politics person I know, so I knew if she was sending me something about the...
How to Be Lonely
How to be lonely in a world of 8 billion people. Don’t text back. Don’t text first. Wonder why no one ever calls. Never call anyone. Be too busy with work. Have a roster. Hold out for perfect. Be open for everyone who comes along. Fuck them on the first date and...